Separation and divorce are common experiences for families in Ontario today.
When parents decide to go their separate ways, one of the most sensitive and important issues that they face is what will happen with their children.
Questions about custody—now called decision-making responsibility—often arise immediately, because both parents want to know how choices about their child’s future will be made.
| Decision-making responsibility in Ontario isdecided based on one central principle—the best interests of the child. The court doesn’t favour mothers over fathers, or one parent over the other. Instead, judges or parents, if they can agree, consider who can best provide the child’s needs and a stable environment to ensure the child’s well-being. |
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Factors such as the child’s age, relationship with each parent, history of caregiving, safety, and cultural or linguistic ties are considered. The ultimate goal is to ensure the child has love, support, and stability, even though the parents live separate lives.
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What does Decision-Making Responsibility mean in Ontario?
Until recently, Ontario family law used the term custody, but the Divorce Act and Ontario’s Children’s Law Reform Act have shifted to language that focuses on the child. Today, instead of custody, courts talk about:
- Decision-making responsibility: which parent (or both) has the authority to make major decisions about the child’s life (education, health, religion, extracurricular activities).
- Parenting time: the schedule that each parent gets to spend time with the child.
This change aims to reduce conflict, because the word “custody” often carries the sense of one parent’s victory over the other. Today, the law emphasizes parental responsibilities rather than ownership.
In short, decision-making responsibility in Ontario is not about who “wins custody,” but about ensuring children have the guidance, stability, and care they need to thrive. One or both parents can be granted the authority to make major decisions, but the focus is always on the child’s best interests.
What is the Legal Framework in Ontario?
In Ontario, child custody (decision-making responsibility) is guided by two principal laws:
- The Divorce Act (federal law) applies to married couples seeking a divorce.
- The Children’s Law Reform Act (CLRA) (provincial law) applies to parents who are separated but not divorcing, or who were never married.
Ultimately, whether your case falls under the federal Divorce Act or Ontario’s Children’s Law Reform Act, the guiding principle is the same: every decision must serve the best interests of the child. These laws provide the structure, but the focus remains on creating parenting arrangements that protect the child’s well-being and enable families to move forward after separation.
The Different Types of Decision-Making Responsibility
Decision-making can be arranged in different ways:
- Sole Decision-Making Responsibility: Whenone parent has the authority to make major decisions. This often occurs when cooperation is difficult or when one parent has been the primary caregiver.
- Joint Decision-Making Responsibility: Whenboth parents share the authority to make decisions. This requires good communication and cooperation.
- Split Decision-Making Responsibility: In rare cases, different parents may handle different areas (for example, one parent makes decisions regarding education and the other makes healthcare decisions).
Courts generally prefer arrangements where both parents stay involved if it benefits the child.
Parenting Time vs. Decision-Making Responsibility
It is worth noting that parenting time is different from decision-making responsibility.
Even if one parent has sole decision-making responsibility, the other parent can usually still retain the right to spend meaningful time with the child, unless there are safety concerns.
Parenting time is also structured based on the child’s best interests and can range from equal shared time to limited supervised visits.
Equal Shared Time
In some cases, parents agree, or a judge decides, that children will spend equal time with both parents. This might seem like a weekly exchange, or a split during the week, such as alternating three or four days. Equal shared time works best when:
- Parents live fairly close to each other.
- Both can provide stable homes and consistent routines.
- Communication is respectful and cooperative.
The goal is not to count hours for a 50/50 win. Rather, the goal is to give the child meaningful relationships with both parents without constant disruption to school, activities, or social life.
Supervised Visits
Supervised visits are ordered by the court when there are concerns about a child’s safety or emotional well-being. This happens when there is a history of family violence, substance abuse, neglect, or long absences from the child’s life. Supervision can happen in different ways:
- Supervised access centres where staff monitor visits.
- A trusted relative or family friend supervising visits in a safe environment.
- Gradual progression, where supervised visits can later move to unsupervised if the parent demonstrates stability.
Supervised visits are not designed to punish one parent. Rather, they aim to make sure that the child is safe and feels comfortable in the company of the parent.
What happens when Parents Agree vs. When Courts Decide
Parents don’t always need to go to court. In fact, most cases are resolved through negotiation, mediation, or parental agreements. If parents can come to a mutually acceptable agreement, they can put their arrangement in writing, which may later be issued as a court order.
If parents cannot compromise, a judge will decide. Court proceedings take more time and cost more, but sometimes, going to court is necessary if the conflict is high or safety is an issue.
The Cost of Going to Court for Decision-Making Responsibility
Taking a parenting dispute to court in Ontario can be expensive, especially if the case is contested.
The cost is influenced by factors such as the settlement speed, the need for interim motions, and the duration of the trial.
- Uncontested or simplified cases: If parents agree quickly and only need a consent order, costs can be relatively low—sometimes in the range of $1,500 to $5,000 in legal fees.
- Contested cases: When parents strongly disagree about decision-making responsibility, costs can be much higher. Hiring a lawyer for a contested custody case ranges from $10,000 to $30,000 or more, depending on the complexity and length of the proceedings.
- Full trial: If the matter proceeds all the way to trial, fees can easily reach $50,000+, especially if expert witnesses (such as psychologists or social workers) are involved.
Other expenses may include:
- Court filing fees (below $500).
- The costs of assessments, such as a Section 30 assessment, can vary greatly and may amount to several thousand dollars.
- Supervised access centre fees, if ordered.
For parents with limited financial means, Legal Aid Ontario may provide assistance, though eligibility depends on one’s income and assets. Some families also turn to mediation or collaborative family law, which are usually far less expensive than litigation.
The bottom line is that while the court can provide a decision when parents can’t agree, it often comes with a heavy financial and emotional cost. For this reason, many families try mediation or negotiation first, and turn to the court system only if absolutely necessary.
Do you need a Family Lawyer to go to court?
Technically, you do not need a lawyer to go to family court in Ontario. You have the right to represent yourself. Many parents choose this route to save on legal fees. However, family law can be complex and emotionally overwhelming, especially when the stakes involve children.
A family lawyer can help you by:
- Explaining your rights and responsibilities.
- Preparing the required forms and evidence.
- Representing you in negotiations, motions, and hearings.
- Advocating for your child’s best interests as allowed by law.
- Prevent costly mistakes that could hurt your case.
If you can’t afford a lawyer, there are other ways to get support:
- Duty counsel (free lawyers available at many courthouses for quick advice or limited representation).
- Family Law Information Centres (FLICs) offer resources and staff to help with forms.
- Legal Aid Ontario, which may cover part or all of your costs if you qualify.
- Mediation services are often more affordable than full legal representation.
Although hiring a lawyer is not mandatory, many parents find it extremely helpful, especially if the case involves serious disputes, allegations of abuse, or requests for sole decision-making responsibility.
A lawyer ensures your case is properly presented and that the focus remains on your child’s best interests.
Can Children Decide Who They Live With?
In Ontario, children don’t get to make the final decision, but their views are still considered, especially as they get older.
A judge may order a Voice of the Child report or involve the Office of the Children’s Lawyer (OCL) to hear the child’s opinions. The older and more mature the child, the more weight their preference carries, but it’s never the only factor.
Cost Comparison for Resolving Parenting Disputes in Ontario
Going to court is not the only option for resolving parenting disputes in Ontario. The costs vary widely depending on the path you choose to take.
Some families succeed in settling disputes through mediation or lawyer-assisted negotiation, while others end up in lengthy court battles. To give you a clearer picture, here’s how the typical costs compare across the different options:
| Option | Average Cost | Pros | Cons |
|---|---|---|---|
| Mediation | $1,000 - $5,000 | Faster, flexible, less adversarial | Both parents need to cooperate |
| Lawyer-negotiated agreement | $2,000 - $10,000 | With legal advice and protection, and a drafted formal agreement | More expensive than mediation, and can still involve conflict |
| Court (for contested cases) | $10,000 - $30,000 | When parents cannot reach an agreement, the court will decide. | Expensive; takes more time to resolve issues, can be emotionally draining |
| Full trial | $50,000 or more | Final resolution with a judge’s ruling | Very expensive, emotionally draining. |
As you can see, as a case progresses to a full court trial, both the emotional and financial costs increase significantly.
While court may be necessary at times, many families find that exploring mediation or negotiation first can be beneficial. These options not only save money but also encourage cooperation, something that often makes life easier for both parents and, most importantly, for the child.
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Finding a Family Lawyer in Ontario
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